Great Expectations...

My hopes were so high!  There was a plan in place and it was perfect!  Life has been admittedly super rough lately, like three years or more lately, and I finally had an idea in place that would be perfect!  It would give me just enough umph to continue on in this crazy, roller coaster world.  And then...disappointment.  Slowly, one piece of my plan gave way and the entire idea crumbled away.  I went from elated and hopeful to downtrodden and angry.  Don't you hate when that happens?

I know it's not quite the optimistic post of yesterday where I was encouraging peace, love, and joy.  But, it's hard to be optimistic when you had your heart set on something that ends up not happening.  It kind of feels like just one more blow in a series of hard times.  And although nothing will ever compare in magnitude to what has happened to my little family in the past, it's still hard to handle disappointment.  BUT, there's also a lesson in it, I'm sure.  God is holding me to task...making me realize that there is something bigger than me in this moment.  That it's HIS plan, HIS timing, HIS path that I should be following.  In the events of my life, quite often, I took control of the drivers seat.  I wanted to save my sinking ship and I did my best to steer out of the storm.  And in the moments when I felt like I was drowning, it only took a quick second for me to say, "God, this is out of my control.  I'm sorry for pushing you aside, but I need you to help me out." and He would.  Not always in the way I wanted, or expected...not in the time that I wanted it...not the answer that I needed, but in the way of HIS plans for me and my family.

So, as much as I wanted, or even NEEDED my perfect plan that I had hatched, I will suck it up and know that it didn't happen for a reason.  Maybe something better is going to come along!!

Tomorrow is my second weigh in...I can't wait!!!  Hopefully it's in the right direction :)  Football weekend and a depressing loss from my Seahawks made for a rough eating day on Sunday...

FOOD FOR THE DAY:
Breakfast: Whole wheat English Muffin, 1 egg, and 2% milk cheese

Lunch: Two pineapple hot dogs, two whole wheat hot dog buns, pineapple, satsumas

Dinner: Pulled pork with coleslaw on a sesame bun, satsumas

Cross your fingers for a good weigh-in!  I'll be checking in tomorrow night :)